Kid Amnesiac

Sometimes it’s the grace notes in a given day that end up making the biggest impact. Today seemed especially full of small gestures or moments that left me smiling and feeling very blessed.

The first was Simon’s head tilt when Molly arrived this morning. It’s hard to explain, but when Simon is very drowsy or very happy, he leans his head over the side. He did it when I came home from Las Vegas, and he did it again today when Molly walked through the front door. Once I told him she was at the door, he hurried down the steps (still on his bottom for this) all the while crying out “Mawee! Mawee!” But once he laid eyes on her, he turned away as though embarrassed by the degree of his emotion and laid his head down sideways on the couch while he collected himself. I thought it adorable.

Later this afternoon, I took him to KIP (Keneseth Israel Preschool) to spend some time in his classroom and on the playground before school starts Thursday. We both enjoyed exploring the room: The primary joy for him was the huge array of wheeled toys; while I got the biggest smile from the various places I found his name. Like his other classmates, his name was in a jewel on the door to his room, on a birthday mural in one corner of the room, and again next to a growth chart in the opposite corner. Then there was a tidy little row of hooks where he and his classmates will hang their back-packs and coats. Each had a star above it with the child’s name printed neatly inside.

I wish I could explain why the sight of this made me smile and get a bit choked up, but I don’t completely understand yet myself. As best I can tell, it’s the combined realization that Simon has become a real little person combined with my appreciation for the care that went into this room-a room that hasn’t been renovated since I was in it for Sunday School in 1976 and that features a wide array of low-tech plastic toys, but that nonetheless oozes a genuine love for children from the train-track rug to the tiny table with 13 chairs that sits on top of it to the butterfly cutouts hanging overhead.

The final grace notes are two newish developments with Simon. For the past few days, he’s been experimenting with his tiptoes. At any given moment, I will catch him out of the corner of my eye getting up on his tip toes and strutting/staggering as he walks like a drunk ballerina. The second is the way he now backs into my lap for a story. Where once I used to get the books and put him in my lap, he now brings me the book he wants to read, turns around, takes several steps backward, and plops himself down when he thinks he’s lined up with my lap.  As he hasn’t mastered walking backwards yet, he does so with a slightly hunched posture and with his derriere-made all the fuller by his huge diaper-sticking out in my direction.

I tell you, even in the midst of a stressful work week, it’s well nigh impossible not to laugh and feel warm inside when I see tanned little legs topped by a protruding tushie come my way ever-so-slightly off center. Sweeter still, these are the few still moments in a given day when I can lean into him, wrap my arms around him, breathe in his scent, and relish his physical presence.