Kid Amnesiac

Do you like my new jeans? I think they fit pretty well. The color may not be the best, but then again, these really weren’t designed for my demographic.

I am modeling the Revert Flex Brite skate jean. They are made by CCS, a company that touts itself as being the world’s largest skate shop.  Shaun White is featured on the current catalogue cover, and their website streams skating videos. In other words, CCS is ground zero for pre- and immediately-post- adolescent males.

Which is only appropriate, as these were in fact purchased as a Chanukah gift for my 14-year-old, skate-boarding nephew. They were the third item on his holiday wish list, and when I plugged in the numbers for his size (28 X 28), I immediately noticed how close they were to my own.

“Wouldn’t it be funny,” I thought to myself, “If I could actually wear Nathan’s jeans?” Well, they came Friday, and they fit. In fact, they fit well. The waist gapped the tiniest amount and the inseam was the tiniest bit long, but everything from the hips down fit better than any pair of jeans I currently own. If I didn’t think it would horrify my nephew, I’d wear these suckers-in neon orange no less-to the family Hanukkah party. But I don’t think he’d appreciate the joke, and I like him too much to mortify him on a holiday.

Still, it does occur to me that this discovery may yield several positive results. For starters, I may have found a new, cheap source for jeans. The Revert Flex comes in normal colors, too. Plus, if current styles hold out, I will have an amazing weapon to use against Simon in the future.

I can just picture it. He’s 13 or so and getting snotty with me in the kitchen when I look up at him, shake my finger in his face, and threaten, “Listen here, Simon! If you continue to take that nasty tone with me, the next time your friends come over I’ll greet them at the door wearing your cool CCS Revert Flex Jeans.” He won’t stand a chance.